25 Things You Shouldn’t Know About Me, But I’m Gonna Tell You Anyways
1. My real name is Gabriel.
2. I have no idea why I call myself Hazard. Probably because it has a Z in it.
3. No, I don’t like the Dukes of Hazzard, if that’s what you’re thinking.
4. In my opinion, pizza is the best food ever invented. Don’t deny it, you. You know it’s true.
5. Also, Wal-Mart is better than Target. There, I said it.
6. Sadly, my right eyebrow is slightly larger than my left. Don’t worry, my doctor says I’ll be fine.
7. I work at a Whataburger, grillin’ up burgers and, occasionally, spitting on them. My saliva contains zero amounts of noxious acid, so I don’t have to worry about being sued anytime soon. phew
8. I have brown hair, so don’t … uh … get any … ideas? Yeah, that makes no sense.
9. I once opened an umbrella indoors, watched a black cat prance right in front of me, spilled some salt on him, and threw a rock at a mirror all in one day, and yet, I’m still alive. Hmm.
10. Oh yeah! I stepped on a crack on the sidewalk too. My mother has never complained about back pain in her life.
11. I’ve only been to 5 states: Texas-which is where I live-, Louisiana, California, New Mexico, and Arizona. And I’ve only flown on a plane once, and didn’t drive to any of those places. And Tommy has three apples, while Rachel has two apples. How many states has Tommy been to?
12. I believe The Road to El Dorado is the best animated movie ever. Once again, don’t deny it.
13. Did I mention I like pizza? Well, I do.
14. Hobos are hilarious.
15. If I could live anywhere, well it would be a Pizza Hut.
16. Unfortunately, I can’t play the guitar. Damn it!
17. God I love pizza!
18. 8 nickels equal 40 cents.
19. I’m running out of ideas now.
20. I lied, it’s just 20 things.
21. Well, don’t I feel stupid.
22. I once owned a Sock’em Bopper. My brother’s face is slightly dented in. These two things are related.
23. was Michael Jordan’s number.
24. PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA!!!
@%. Ooops. Gotta remember to let go of that shift key.
Well, now you know everything there is to know about me.
July 16, 2009 at 10:36 pm
I just have to comment on the whole pizza/Pizza Hut thing.
I’ve been told that pizza in the south is not nearly as good as pizza in the north. And I asked, even Pizza Hut? Because I would think it would be quite standardized. I was told it’s not as good by my sister who lives in Alabama.
My aunt, who owns a home in Texas, has even gone so far as to freeze uncooked pizzas and bring them with her to Texas, bake them up, and amaze people. No one’s been able to tell me the difference, but since I live in Wisconsin, which is made of cheese, I’m guessing that has something to do with it.
I know cheese exists everywhere, but it’s probably more expensive to ship good stuff all over the place. Maybe that’s it.
So if you ever get to take your second plane ride and it happens to be to the Midwest, make sure you get some pizza. Because it’s better.
July 17, 2009 at 5:44 pm
Oh…My…God.
There actually IS such a thing as BETTER pizza!? I must have it! NOW!
aHHHHHHHHHHHHH!